Last First Kiss
by barbershoppepole
Summary: HUMANSTUCK AU. In high school, it's hard enough to get by with okay grades, when these three couples have to force their way through the crowds of hate and love, what will happen? Not to mention, they're all in love with their best friends! Sorry for the crappy summary, but it's hard to describe this story. GamTav, JohnDave, SolKat. Rated T for now, but knowing me... ;)
1. Chapter 1

Last First Kiss

Chapter 1

Gamzee woke up early one day, smiling at the world. He knew today was a good day because he had some…stuff…that he was excited about. He got out of bed and went to his drawers, grabbing some clothes. He pulled on his ridiculous black skinny jeans with a purple Capricorn symbol on the ass and his ICP band tee shirt. He nodded at himself in the mirror, satisfied. He wasn't the most handsome man out there, but he was pretty attractive with a strong looking jaw and laugh lines around his eyes. He wasn't tan, but he wasn't extremely white like some of his friends. He reached his hand towards the top of his dresser, avoiding hitting his glass baubles that were lined up along the top. He collected clown statues that creeped most of his friends out, so he kept them hidden in his room. Their smiling faces watched him as he grabbed a brush and hurriedly ran it through his mass of black hair; it went down to around his chin, but poofed out along the sides, giving it a lot of volume. He reached into his underwear drawer, pulling out his pipe and a lighter. He had packed it the night before, taking his time to get it as tight as possible. He loped to his window seat, opening the window a crack and shivering as the wind blew. He put the pipe up to his lips and tilted the lighter, flicking it on. The flame caught the weed and burned as he inhaled. He pulled the lighter away and continued inhaling, moving the pipe away from his lips and sucking in more air. He blew it out towards the window, watching the smoke catch the wind and fly away. He chuckled and took another hit, feeling the smoke make its way down to his lungs as he listened to the birds chirping. And yelling. His eyes widened and he blew the smoke out. He heard his best friend yelling his way down the road, probably ranting about something.

Gamzee put his pipe down on the window sill, reaching his hand behind him for a Faygo, hoping he wouldn't get cotton mouth from the smoke. He took a swig from the bottle of blue delicious miracles and walked back to his dresser. He put the drink down and grabbed his can on Axe, spraying it on himself to mask the scent. He grabbed his purple string bag, decorated in polka dots. He liked people knowing of his status as a Juggalo. He thought it was the shit, so other people should, too. It sure as hell made the motherfuckers back off. He put the can of Axe in his bag and went back to his dresser, throwing the bag onto his bed. He grabbed his favorite purple beanie and put it on his head, taming the hair for a little while. He grabbed a Ziploc bag and put his pipe and lighter in it, he'd have to finish at school if he ever wanted to tame the voices in his head. He wasn't crazy, per se, but he did want to stay as calm as possible at school. Mistakes could be made, he could be pushed too far, and he didn't want to hurt his friends. The yelling was getting louder, he knew he had to hurry. _Come the motherfuck on, Makara. You have to be ready or he really WILL be mad. The silly little motherfucker, all up and worried about my "health." I wonder what color he's wearing today. Colors are amazing little miracles. All up and bringing light and happiness to the- NO. Get a move on. _He shook his head at his thoughts and walked out to his kitchen with his bag, shoving the weed into it. He walked to his fridge and grabbed a few more Faygos. He dropped his almost full bag onto his kitchen table and leaned over it, grabbing his phone and iPod from their places on the floor, where they had been charging. His purple headphones clacked together as he wrapped them around the device. He sighed in relief as his doorbell was rung, signaling Karkat's arrival. "Come on in, bro," Gamzee yelled towards the door, sliding his phone and iPod into his jeans' front pocket. "A motherfucker's gotta brush his teeth." Gamzee made his way to the bathroom just as his front door opened. He quickly brushed his teeth, not really caring how good of a job he did. Not like it mattered. He walked out of the bathroom, his big smile on his face as he saw his best friend leaning against the wall, glaring at him.

"Hey, fuckass," his little friend greeted loudly. "Where's your makeup? Aren't you s'posed to wear it all the time? Isn't that a Juggalo thing or whatever?" Gamzee stared at Karkat, surprised that he cared. Karkat was short, around five foot five, and he had dark bags under his eyes from relentlessly studying until he passed out at his books. He cared deeply about grades, and it affected his appearance. He could be handsome if he slept on a normal schedule, but he was okay looking regardless. Many girls found him cute, even if Karkat didn't notice them. Karkat was staring at Gamzee, a confused look in his red eyes.

Gamzee's own indigo one's widened before he chuckled, brushing off the fact that Karkat hadn't said anything about him staring. "Nah, Karbro, I'm all up and wearing my ICP shirt." He slung his bag over his shoulder and grinned, walking over to the shorter boy and flinging an arm around his shoulder.

Karkat brushed him off and walked back towards the front door, opening it and walking out. "Whatever. Let's just go. We're already late." Gamzee strolled out after him, barely remembering to close the front door. He caught up easily to his best friend and chuckled again. They walked down the street in the direction of the school, Gamzee walking slowly so Karkat could keep up, and the latter practically jogging to stay next to the tall boy. They made it to the school in a matter of minutes, Gamzee didn't live that far away, and they met up with their friends at the entrance of the school. The group was quite large, there were 14 people standing there, and everyone else avoided them like the plague. "It's always so easy to find them," Karkat grumbled and walked over, Gamzee following slowly. The tall clown watched as his short friend walked over to Terezi and started yelling at the turquoise eyed blind girl as she laughed, cutting him off with a kiss. Gamzee smiled at their antics, glad that they were happy in their messed-up relationship.

"Uh, hi, Gamzee," the tall male turned, his grin growing wider as he saw the sandy-eyed boy behind him. "Uh, how are you today?"

Gamzee winked at his stuttering bro. "I'm all up and motherfucking fine, Tavbro." He looked at the paraplegic worriedly. "How are you?"

Tavros chuckled and smiled his nervous smile. "Uh, well, I'm good. I haven't run into, uh, Vriska today, so, uh, I should be fine." His tan skin wrinkled as a worry line appeared on his face and he bit his lip. Vriska always messed with him because he had low self-esteem. He was part Mexican, shown through the tan skin, and he had gotten into an accident when he was a kid, it was her fault. She had pushed him off a tree onto the monkey bars, snapping his back and paralyzing him from the waist down. Ever since then, he hadn't been very confident and she attacked all his flaws.

Gamzee's eyes narrowed, he was extremely pissed. "If she all up and MOTHERFUCKING picks on you, you better MOTHERFUCKING call me. GOT IT?" He put his hands on the arm rests of the chair, leaning into Tavros' face as he yelled, his hands gripping the rests, knuckles white with strain.

Tavros calmed his heart rate down, his face going pale. He leaned away from Gamzee and spoke in a whisper. "Y-yeah. I'll call you. " He smiled nervously and chewed on his lip. "G-Gamzee? Did you, uh, smoke today?" The taller male stood up and shook his head, his fists still clenched.

He backed away from Tavros slowly. "Sorry, Tavbro. I should all up and motherfucking do that, huh? Don't want to scare a motherfucker away before school starts." He turned and walked away from the group, making his way to the side of the school, the druggie corner. There were a few people there already, smoking it up. He was getting watched by all of them, they knew he came from a home with money and they never really liked the fact that he smoked near them. After he finished off his pipe, he strolled back towards his friends, stumbling a bit and laughing. He pulled another Faygo from his bag and opened it, listening to the fizz and sighing. He felt Karkat's glare and waved lazily at his best friend. He walked back to Tavros and put his bag on the cripple's lap, walking behind his wheelchair and pushing them to first period, Spanish.

Tavros started muttering in Spanish, freaking out slightly. "Ah, Dios. Mierda. Joder. No alucinar. Es bien. Ah, Dios." He mouthed the words as he was being pushed to class, away from his friends. He hoped that Gamzee wasn't taking him away to be alone like he did Equius last time.

"Don't up and motherfucking worry, Tavbro. I'm just gettin' us there early to slam a Faygo. You want one, bro?" he chuckled and almost crashed them into a wall.

Tavros relaxed into his chair again, opening Gamzee's bag and taking a Faygo out. He unscrewed the cap and listened to the fizz, hearing Gamzee sigh at the sound. The clown pushed them into their classroom, making his way to an empty table where they could sit. He parked Tavros' chair at the end of a table at the back of the classroom and pulled a chair up, sitting down close to the cripple. They chatted until their teacher walked in, starting class.

Gamzee zoned out as soon as the teacher started talking, not really worried about Spanish. Tavros noticed that and sighed, taking notes for his baked friend. He was used to this, but wondered how the clown passed his other classes. He stared at Gamzee and took notes until the bell rang, with Gamzee still daydreaming. As Tavros started putting his notebook away, Gamzee disappeared from his line of sight. Strong arms started pushing him to his next class. Tavros relaxed and leaned his head on the head rest, leaving his safety in Gamzee's hands. They arrived at Tavros' math class and the paraplegic felt a soft kiss on his head as Gamzee's bag was stolen from his lap. He blushed and rolled himself into the classroom.

Gamzee loped to his art class, taking his sweet motherfucking time. He pretended that he hadn't noticed Tavros' blush and hoped that his face wasn't the same color. His friend and crush was so cute sometimes, with his nervous stuttering and big smile. Gamzee chuckled and plopped his stuff down as he sat on his stool by his best friend. "Hey, best friend."

"You smell like weed, you asshole." Karkat refused to look in Gamzee's direction, choosing instead to stare at the easel placed in front of him. The taller of the two sighed and put his arm over the grump's shoulder. "What the FUCK do you want?"

"Karbro, calm the motherfuck down. Slam a Faygo. Watch the miracles of life unfold." He took a Faygo from God-knows-where and threw it onto Karkat's lap.

"Get this stupid, sugary substance off me," he yelled, shaking his sandy blonde head. He had a streak of honey-bee yellow in his hair, the outcome of losing a bet to their friend Sollux.

"KK, don't freak." Gamzee turned to see the Asian walking towards them, 3-D glasses on. The boy had blonde hair and quite the smug smirk on his lips. His hair shimmered in the light, showing off his cherry red streak.

"Solbro! Like your motherfucking hair, man. It's so…colorful. Miraculous." Gamzee smiled widely at Sollux's streak, staring at the way the light reflected off of his head. He'd have to do that to Tavros. _Motherfuck. Yeah, you do that after you finally tell him how you feel. Maybe sometime. I just need to get a date set up or something, invite him over or whatever. I wonder what he'd look with purple hair. Purple. Like a flower. A pretty violet with big, sandy brown eyes and the cutest smile. _He shook his head, laughing at himself. When pigs fly, man. Gamzee turned his thoughts back to his friends near him. They were talking, a blush present on Karkat's face. He knew that his bros had flush-crushes on each other, but with his best friend in a relationship, nothing would happen. Neither of them knew they had crushes on each other. It was the cutest thing, really. His eyes closed as he listened to their argument over coding or something and he fell asleep while sitting on his stool. His eyes opened in shock as the door was slammed open. The teacher strolled in, grinning as she saw Gamzee's expression.

"Alright, kiddos. Let's get started. The canvases are in the corner and you know where the brushes and paints are." She watched in amusement as her students jumped up to grab their supplies. Gamzee walked over and grabbed his canvas and plate for his paints. He placed them by his easel and went over to the paints and grabbed the biggest and smallest brushes he could. He put the brightest colors he could find and put them on his plate, the reds and blues and yellows mixing together in a cacophony of colors. He went back to his spot and sat down, ready to begin the project she was giving them. Karkat rolled his eyes at his best friend, seeing the paint all mixed together. His was meticulously placed with enough space for mixing, if needed. The teacher stood up, radiating authority. "So, today, I think that you all deserve something…easy." She smirked. "Paint a dream you've had recently."

The class groaned, well, everyone but Gamzee. He loved art class. Especially when he was really baked. This would be a piece of cake. He picked up the big brush and dipped it in the red paint. He slashed the brush across his canvas, leaving a streak of red. He ignored the weird looks he was getting, putting another slash across the canvas, watching the red paint drip down the canvas and onto the floor. He dipped his brush in the blue next, slashing that across, watching the colors mix. He continued until he had all the colors of the rainbow on his canvas, the paint dripping and mixing together in a beautiful mess. The teacher walked behind him, nodding and smiling at his painting. Gamzee grinned at his painting and started cleaning up, leaving only the paint on his hands. He loved the feel of it.

He stood away from the canvas slightly, thinking about the dream he had had the night before. The colors were the eye colors of his friends' eyes. He remembered how they had all been wide with fear in his dream, the images mixing together until the eyes were splotches of color like they were on the painting. He shut his eyes and shivered, trying to calm himself down. He hadn't been able to get that dream out of his mind. It scared him but excited him. At times, it seemed that he WANTED it to happen. He started thinking of Tavros. Sweet, harmless Tavros. Just the thought of him calmed Gamzee down. He looked over to see Karkat's project. It was a mixture of red and blue. Gamzee smirked, knowing that the short male had been dreaming of Sollux again. _Damn. What's it take to get a few motherfuckers together?_

He would ask Karkat about it later. Gamzee leaned towards the side more, hoping to catch a glimpse of Sollux's project. He had added more detail than both Karkat and Gamzee combined. He had thick, black circles put on the canvas, starting at the bottom and diagonally moving up until they reached the top. There were twelve in all. The blotches had horoscope symbols on them, in the color of everyone's eyes. The grey Cancer symbol was at the bottom, and Gamzee's own Capricorn symbol was drawn near the top, in the third to last circle. Their other friends' were filled in between, all twelve circles having one. The circles were odd, looking more like half-people than circles. They all had horns on them, Karkat's being the smallest. Gamzee smiled at it, loving the small look into Sollux's mind. "Nice motherfucking pictures, bros," he grinned as he looked at their canvases. Karkat nodded and smiled a little, obviously proud. Sollux, on the other hand, blushed and tried to cover his picture.

"Thankth I gueth," he lisped out, shaken. "It wath a weird dream, let me tell you."

Gamzee nodded as Sollux launched into his tale, talking about trolls and some weird game, SGRUB, and a meteor. He laughed at all the antics they had gotten up to, but sobered up when Sollux talked of him going crazy and killing their friends. "Solbro… that sounds like my dream." Karkat's eyes widened as he looked at each of them, his head whipping back and forth between the two. Gamzee shook himself out of the shock and smiled, hiding the weird feeling he had in his gut. The bell rang just then, saving them from an awkward silence, and the boys jumped up, bringing their canvases to the front of the room. Gamzee hugged them both tightly, he was a clingy guy, and walked out the door. He made his way to the library, having a study hall, and found himself an empty table. He put his stuff down in the chair next to him so no one would sit there and put his head down on his arms. _Damn, I'm up and tired._ His eyes closed and he fell asleep, dreaming of nothing but flowers and colors.

He woke up an hour later to the bell ringing obnoxiously and he groaned, rubbing his eyes. He stretched his back and stood up, grabbing his bag and making his way towards the cafeteria, weaving around groups of students standing in the middle of the hallways like idiots. He found his friends in the back of the cafeteria and smiled, he really loved them. They were all miracles in his life. He noticed a lack of Terezi, but thought nothing of it until he saw Karkat crying in Sollux's arms, his head buried in the Asian's neck. "What's wrong, Karbro," he asked, walking over to the pair.

"F-fucking Terezi was cheating on me," Karkat let out a small sob and Sollux started rubbing soothing circles on his back. Gamzee's heart broke, seeing his best friend like that. His eyes narrowed and darkened. He walked away from the group, looking for Terezi. He ran his hands through his messy hair, taking off his beanie and tossing it to Tavros. "Tavbro, you keep this safe while I go talk to…_sis._" He cracked his knuckles and looked around the room, his eyes finally resting on familiar red sunglasses. Terezi was sitting with Dave, John, Jade and Rose. "TEREZI."

She turned her head to his voice blindly, her face paling. "Oh, hey, Gamzee."

He growled lowly, getting more pissed by the second. "Who was it?"

"Who was what," her voice seemed strained, her hands tapping the table.

"The one you cheated on Karbro with," Gamzee cracked his knuckles again, trying to scare her.

She giggled nervously, placing her head in one hand, leaning on the table. "Some football player."

"YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW YOU BI-" He was stopped by a hand tugging on his sleeve. He growled and raised his hand but felt a harder tug on him. He turned and saw Tavros, looking scared and close to tears.

"Go," the cripple mouthed, trying to hold back tears. Gamzee nodded and ran off, trying to hold back his anger. He felt stares on his back from people who had heard him yelling, but he ignored them, running to a corner where he could be invisible, panting with anger. Gamzee couldn't believe that he had lost his cool that easily. He guessed he wasn't as under control as he thought. He took out the little bag of pills that he kept in his pocket for emergencies and popped two in his mouth, dry swallowing them. He walked back over to the large group of friends, nodding at Tavros and taking a seat next to Karkat and Sollux. He sat for the rest of the period, comforting his heart broken best friend.

**kisses and disses**

John eyed Terezi in shock, wondering how she could do that to Karkat. Sure, he and Karkat weren't the closest friends, but he still cared about the guy. What she did was horrible. Jade had the same look on her face as she jumped up and ran to the bigger group. Probably to help comfort him. Dave kept his poker face on, but his gaze didn't turn to Terezi. Rose was reading, as usual, and probably missed the whole thing. John decided he'd fill her in later. "So, uh, anyways. You should come over after school, Dave," John awkwardly stated, to break the silence. His platinum blonde friend nodded a little, smirking his signature Strider Smirk.

"Sounds good, John. I'll do it. If you can wrestle me to the ground."

John blushed and sighed. He was miffed that Dave was making fun of his height again. "Daaave," he whined. He had a huge crush on the kid, but he couldn't tell the blonde. It would ruin their friendship. Dave was as straight as a laser beam. John wouldn't stand a chance.

"What, bro? You got a problem with me being taller than you," Dave smiled at the little derp's blush. He'd make John his, even if he wasn't a homosexual, or so he says. Dave was a Strider. He could turn straight men gay and lesbians straight. He already had a plan in place. "I'm kidding, you derp. Of course I'll go to your place. Get ready for the time of your life." Literally.

John blushed harder, hearing the innuendo and the small, flirtatious hint in Dave's voice. "We can hang out! Just like old times. It's been forever since we've hung out. Plus, I don't really want to be alone tonight." Dave nodded, understanding. John let his mind trail off, but shook his head as dirty thoughts of Dave flooded his mind. _We're just hanging out. _He knew Dave was joking, he flirted with everyone, but that thought calmed him and made his heart flutter in pain. _Damn it, Dave. Don't fuck with me like this._ He let out a small smile and took a sip from his water bottle. After a few more moments in awkward silence, the bell rang. John sighed in relief and slung his blue backpack on his shoulder. The bag slammed into his back as he waved goodbye to his friends and he quickly turned away. He walked out of the room, heading to biology, his favorite class of the day. He didn't want to be late.

John was practically shaking with excitement as he sat at his table, the date slipping his mind. He wanted nothing on his mind but the dissection they were doing that day. He looked up at his half-sister, grinning as she sat down. He opened his mouth to say something, but she had already fallen asleep. He ruffled her messy black hair and started daydreaming, his blue eyes glazing over. He was around Karkat's height, maybe an inch taller. He was a pipsqueak compared to Dave, who was around six feet. Dave bragged about his being taller all the time, trying to annoy John. The blue eyed boy didn't know why Dave wanted to piss him off; he just knew that it was something Dave wanted. Probably so he could tease him about getting mad, too. He grabbed two pairs of goggles, walking over to the pegs on the wall. He grabbed two lab coats and made his way back to his table. He put the coat on Jade's head, placing her goggles next to her. He sat down again just as the teacher walked in. He quickly gave instructions and passed out the frogs. The tin got set on the desk in front of John and he giggled, excited.

John gently shook Jade awake and her head shot up, sending her glasses flying. Their classmate, Nepeta, handed them back to the green eyed girl, smirking. John's eyes grew curious as he stared at the cat-obsessed girl, wondering what could be going on in her mind. It seemed like she had been looking at them for a while. She was short, shorter than John, and had a cute bob cut, the brunette hair framing her face in an adorable way. Jade took the glasses thankfully and smiled her dorky grin at her equally dorky half-brother. They both had thick dark brown hair that they couldn't keep neat, buck teeth and bad eyesight. The only differences in their appearances were their eye color and the fact that she was a little taller than he was. He was five foot five, which was short compared to her five foot eight, Rose's five foot seven and Dave's six feet. They all thought it was cute that John was so short. It made him attract a lot of attention and made it seem like he was a hot item on the dating market, he was cute in an attractive way. Rose and Jade knew, though, that he was only on the market for Dave.

He grinned back at her in excitement, putting his goggles on over his thick black glasses, his bright blue eyes shimmering. "Let's do this," he told her, trying to seem cool. He picked up a scalpel and started the dissection.

It turned out that letting John take control was a bad idea. He ended up vomiting after he broke the frog's jaw and cut it in half. He kept apologizing to his sister as he was forced to go the nurse's office. She just waved him off and continued working, going twice the speed he went. He made it to the nurse and lied down on a school cot, sweating from vomiting and blushing from embarrassment. He took out his phone and opened his Pesterchum app. Noticing Dave was online, he clicked his handle.

ectoBiologist [EB] has started pestering turntechGodhead [TG]

EB: hey dave!

TG: bro aren't you in bio

TG: thought youd be doing bio things

TG: like a little dorky scientist

EB: hehe, well i was

EB: but we were dissecting today

EB: threw up from the smell

EB: and the sound of a frog's jaw breaking

TG: oh bro

TG: that sucks, egderp

TG: you at the nurse

EB: yeah

EB: she isn't here

EB: so i'm just laying here

TG: bro. im gonna be right there

EB: dave, you don't have to

TG: bro

TG: lay your little head down

TG: your doctor is arriving soon

TG: with some sick fires to heal you

turntechGodhead [TG] has ceased pestering ectoBiologist [EB]

John sighed as he put his phone on his chest, resting his hands on it. What had happened in his past lives to get him a guy as awesome as Dave? He closed his eyes and found himself drifting off, daydreaming about his best friend, the mental images getting more and more erotic. His eyes snapped open as he heard the door click shut. He turned his head to see a pair of shades in front of him. "Shit!"

Dave chuckled, backing away from the bed, a grin slipping onto his lips. "Ha. Got you, bro," he pulled a chair over to the cot and sat down, throwing his bag on the floor next to John's. The red contrasted the blue in an irritating, yet comforting, way. "What the fuck happened?"

"I don't know! I was doing fine, pinning the frog down and such, but then I had to break the jaw and the smell got to me!" He blushed, reliving the moment.

Dave's lips tightened with worry, but his eyes showed nothing behind his shades. He didn't like John being hurt or sick, even for something as dumb as dissecting a frog. "You still want me over, Egderp?"

"Yeah," John practically yelled. "It's my dad's birthday. I don't…want to be alone."

Dave paled at the mention of John's dad. The man had died a year ago and John had been living alone since. Dave went over as much as he could, but the school year had been keeping him busy. "Hell yeah! We could watch movies or some shit. Fuck, we could act like girls if you want. Talk about boys or some stupid shit like that." Dave smirked, not afraid to let his uncool side out around John.

John smiled his dorky grin, the color slowly returning to his face. "Yeah! There's this ONE boy…yum," he giggled.

Dave put his head in his hands and leaned on his knees, looking like a gossiping girl. "Oooh, girl, who is it?" He chuckled along with his best friend, hoping no one would walk in at that moment.

John blushed and changed the subject. "The bell's gonna ring soon. Help me up?" Dave nodded and assisted the boy, making a mental note to ask John about his crush later. The boys walked out of the nurse's office, heading towards the main office. They were going to the cemetery like they did on every holiday. After getting signed out, they were Juniors so they could leave if needed, they walked to Dave's motorcycle. "Dude, I told you to borrow your bro's car," John whined.

"He left before me. I couldn't take it. C'mon, it isn't that bad riding bitch." He took out a helmet and tossed it to John before putting his own on. John sighed and clipped the helmet on, pouting. Dave straddled the bike, waiting patiently for John to sit behind him and wrap his wiry arms around him. Dave's backpack was in front of him on the bike and John grabbed onto it to make sure it wouldn't fall. He, himself, was wearing his backpack. Dave tried not to blush as he felt John press against him, but he failed. He just hoped John didn't notice. Hitting the gas, they sped off.

The wind whipped John's hair, but he didn't notice. He was thinking about Dave's blush earlier. _Maybe he's embarrassed by me sitting like that. _He loosened his grip around Dave's waist and pulled away slightly. They made it to the cemetery in record time, there was no traffic, and John got off the bike. He took the helmet off his messy head and set it on the ground by the bike, along with his helmet. He completely forgot about Dave as he saw the name on the immaculately kept gravestone. He walked over to it and kneeled in front of it, shoulders slumping. His eyes watered as he whispered, "Happy birthday, Dad."

Dave silently walked behind his best bro and he kneeled beside him, wrapping an arm around John's shoulders and pulling him close. "Happy birthday, Dad."

**kisses and disses**

Karkat's eyes tightened with worry as he saw John get onto the back of Dave's bike. He didn't like his friend getting on the metal death trap, but trusted Strider not to crash. He turned his attention back to his English teacher who kept blathering on about Romeo and Juliet. Karkat, having read the play multiple times, tuned him out. His thoughts found themselves on Terezi. How could she cheat on him? He thought they loved each other. _I thought a lot of things. _He wrote down the notes on the board, his expression saddened, and then went back to his thoughts. _Sure, I'm not the most attractive, but I have some good qualities. Though, I'm not as heartbroken as I thought I would be. Maybe…I didn't love her as much as I thought? No. You loved her, Karkat. You did. Just…not as much as you SHOULD when you're in a relationship with someone. The only reason you shouldn't love them would be if you had feelings for someone else. But, you didn't. Right? _ The only person that came to mind was Sollux. He didn't love Sollux, though. Right? That wouldn't make any sense. They were friends, and anyways, Sollux would never feel the same way. _Did she find out about… No. She couldn't have. _He scratched his wrist through his long-sleeved shirt, feeling as though everyone knew about his cutting. He shook his head again and felt his phone buzz in his pocket. He reached his hand down and put the phone in his lap, checking it. It was Gamzee on their dumb Trollian app.

terminallyCapricious [TC] has started trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

TC: hEy MoThErFuCkEr

TC: YoU oKaY?

TC: hOnK

CG: YES, I'M FINE

CG: WHY

TC: aBoUt TeReZi, MaN

CG: WOW. THANKS FOR REMINDING ME.

CG: TOTALLY MAKING ME FEEL LIKE SHIT

TC: sOrRy KaRbRo

TC: Im AlL uP aNd MoThErFuCkInG wOrRiEd

TC: EaSe A bRoS sOuL

CG: THERE'S NO NEED TO WORRY. I'M FINE.

TC: kArBrO

CG: GAMZEE

TC: wAnT tO uP aNd MoThErFuCkInG

TC: sLeEp OvEr ToNigHt? :o)

CG: WHAT THE FUCK

CG: WHY

CG: IF YOU'RE LONELY, ASK TAVROS

TC: :o(

TC: I wAnT tO uP aNd SpEnD tImE wItH mY

TC: bEsT fRiEnD

TC: hOnK

CG: CAN'T TONIGHT. BUSY.

TC: :o( hOnK

CG: SORRY. I HAVE PLANS.

TC: kArBrO

CG: I DO, OKAY

TC: yOu SuRe YoU wOnT…

TC: yOu KnOw?

CG: I FUCKING PROMISE

TC: GoOd :o)

CG: WHATEVER, FUCKASS.

CG: I HAVE TO GO.

TC: AlRiGhT, kArBrO. bYe.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling terminallyCapricious [TC]

"Dumbass," Karkat muttered under his breath. He glared out the window until the bell rang, and then proceeded to exit the room. He walked towards the school gym, last class of the day. The teacher didn't really care about teaching them, only helped the jocks and other athletes. Karkat had no problem asking her for a pass to the library. She nodded and grabbed a pad of passes, asking for his name. He sighed. "Karkat Vantas." She handed him a pass and waved him off, like she did every class. He strolled to the library, knowing that Sollux had a study the same period he had gym. He saw the blonde sitting at a table, his stupidly adorable red streak like a beacon. Karkat walked over and sat down in the seat across from him, setting his stuff down on the floor beside him. "Hey, Sollux."

Sollux replied without looking up. "Hey, KK," he scribbled something down in his notebook and then tapped on his phone, probably coding something. Karkat smiled and took out his sketch pad, starting to doodle a little. He zoned out during his doodling and re-awoke to fingers snapping in his face. "KK? Did you hear me?" Karkat shook his head, a light pink tint on his cheeks. "I thaid, are you okay? After what happened with TZ…"

Karkat bit his lip and looked at Sollux, his pencil not moving. He looked down at his sketch pad and continued drawing. "I'm fine."

"KK, I'm calling bullthit on you." Sollux crossed his arms, his expression worried.

"No, really. I mean, yeah, I love her, I always will. But…I'm not upset." He drew a hair line, not really focusing on WHO he was drawing. He just had to keep the pencil moving.

"KK, you thound like an idiot trying to tell yourthelf that," the blonde smirked and started coding again, knowing that he was getting on the boy's nerves.

"I'm serious, THOLLUX. She did what she did because I'm not good enough for her. I wasn't smart enough to show my emotions well enough, and I'm not attractive enough for her. I'm not enough." He smiles a little, used to thinking this way. He adds on a smug grin in his sketch, drawing the lines with ease. Sollux's head snapped up as he heard Karkat talk that way. He didn't like it. Karkat's eyes met his over the top of the sketchbook, but they quickly looked away. The boy was blushing badly behind his wall of paper, thinking only of Sollux's eyes. _No. You can't love SOLLUX, the lisping asshole. It…can't be him because he's your best friend. Dammit. Karkat, you fuck everything up, you annoying shithead. _His eyes widened and he realized it was true. He was in love with his best friend. Karkat facepalmed and got fingers snapped in his face again.

"KK. Karkat," Sollux's lips were tight, and worried lines appeared in his forehead. Karkat looked at him, a glare evident in his eyes. "KK, you ARE good enough. The'th jutht a bitch. The didn't detherve you."

Karkat looked down at his sketch. Unbeknownst to him, he had drawn Sollux. "Fuck," he muttered.

Sollux stared at him again. "KK…when wath the latht time you cut?" Karkat's eyes flashed up in shock, then quickly looked down again, answering Sollux's question. "Tho, latht night? KK, promith me you'll thtop doing that." Karkat shook his head, chuckling darkly. "KK, pleath, for me?"

Karkat's eyes welled up and he chewed on his lip. He couldn't promise Sollux something like that, especially since he'd break it right away. His eyes met the Asian's and he found himself nodding. Sollux's smile of relief eased the pain, but Karkat couldn't help but get an empty feeling in his gut as the guilt set in. He knew that as soon as he went home, he'd break that promise. He could only hope that Sollux wouldn't find out. His eyes went back down to his sketch of Sollux and he started drawing the arms, making them stringy as a computer nerd's arms are, but strong from years of sparring with Karkat. They always sparred, trying to best the other. Everything between him and Sollux was a competition. From their grades, the reason he was always so tired, to how many hot dogs they could eat in one sitting, the answer is 14 with Karkat being the winner, they always had a reason to compete. Karkat couldn't help but wonder if that was the only reason they spent time together. They pushed each other to be the best they could be, with name calling and arguments.

Karkat sighed internally, his eyes travelling back up to Sollux's face. The blonde had started his coding again, his smile growing as he got the codes right. He watched him for a little while, pencil still moving. The small scratching sounds were soothing as he focused on memorizing every detail of Sollux. He hoped that the only reason they hung out wasn't just for the competition. If he really was in love with Sollux, he was but still, he wanted them to hang out to be together. He would compete harder if it would mean that Sollux would be around more.

Karkat looked back down at his sketch, smiling at it. It caught the essence of Sollux completely. He started inking it with his pen, trying to make it as perfect as possible. Maybe he'd show the blonde, someday.

Sollux glanced up from his coding and stared at Karkat, who was inking something on his sketchpad. He hoped that the boy wasn't drawing Terezi or something. He didn't need that as a reminder of his pain. Sollux was still in shock that the blind girl could do that to his friend. Sure, he was in love with the kid, had been for years, but he wanted Karkat to be happy, even if it meant being with someone that wasn't Sollux. He had known about Karkat's cutting problem for years, and every time a new scar appeared on the short boy's delicate wrist, Sollux felt empty. He wished that Karkat would talk to him instead of just pretending all the time. He wanted Karkat to know that he was there, but the boy might be afraid.

Sollux knew that the boy was afraid of his own shadow, but he wished that he wasn't. The Asian knew that Karkat was hurting, but the boy wouldn't admit it. "KK?"

"For God's sake, WHAT?" Karkat's angry glare fizzled when he saw Sollux's worried expression.

"KK, I'm here for you. You know that right?"

Karkat blushed and hid his face behind his sketch pad again. "Yeah, Sollux. I know," he heard a small sigh and decided to speak a little more. "I cut myself because I feel like I'm not a good human being. Just thought you should know."

Sollux's eyes widened behind his glasses, a gasp coming out of his mouth. "You are a good human being, though. KK, you're the betht human being! Theriouthly. Thure, you're loud and obnoxiouth, but you have a good heart and you're there for your friendth without hethitation. If that ithn't a good human being, I don't know what ith." He blushed a little and started coding again.

"Thanks," Karkat whispered. They sat there in silence, each working hard on their projects. Karkat bit his lip, trying to get Sollux's eyes right. He couldn't get them the perfect shape behind the shades, eventually he gave up, focusing on a different part of his sketch. He focused on the legs, drawing Sollux in his favorite pair of skinny jeans. Honestly, the guy couldn't get any cuter. He drew little bumble bees around the drawing, adding them in on the edges of the paper. He smiled at his finished drawing and closed his notepad. Sollux stood up and started cleaning, looking a little miffed. "Where are you going?"

Sollux gave Karkat a "you're-a-dumbass" look. "KK, thcool'th over." He laughed as Karkat blushed, and threw his backpack over his shoulder. "Don't worry. Hey, am I thtill going to your plathe?"

Karkat bit the inside of his cheek and stood up, reaching down to grab his bag, too. He stood before Sollux and stared at him. "Yeah. If you want to."

Sollux stared into his red eyes and sighed. _Now or never. _He grabbed Karkat's shoulder and pulled him close, still staring deeply into his eyes. "KK."

Karkat stared back, wide eyed. He didn't know what Sollux was doing. "What the fuck are you doing, you-" he was cut off by Sollux roughly pushing their soft lips together in an awkward kiss.

**kisses and disses**

Hi! So, this chapter took me forever to write and type. Most of the chapters in this story, okay all of them, will be this length, so updates will take a little while x.x I'm sorry. I will try to update as often as possible and give the best I can give. I will put my LIFE in this story, dammit! Hehe, not that I HAVE a life, but still. :* Reviews are greatly appreciated! Thank you so much.


	2. Chapter 2

Last First Kiss

Chapter Two

Tavros rolled out of the school, making his way to where Gamzee was standing, zoning out. Tavros blushed in glee as he thought of the fun they'd be having. Wait! No! Not THAT kind of fun! You sick bastards! Anyway, he knew that he usually rejected Gamzee's offer, he often had night terrors, but he really wanted to have a serious conversation with the Juggalo. He let Gamzee zone for a few more minutes before clearing his throat. "Uh, hey, Gamzee!"

The clowns head snapped down and he grinned wildly. "Hey, motherfucker." Tavros returned the smile and gently took Gamzee's backpack from his clenched hands. He set the bag on his lap, a little worried. "Thanks, Tavbro. It was getting all up and motherfucking heavy."

"Heh, I thought it was." He paused and looked into Gamzee's eyes, staring at his pupils. "Uh, Gamzee?"

"Yeah, Tavbro?" the capricorn walked around Tavros' chair and started pushing the cripple out of the parking lot. Tavros leaned forward in his chair, keeping away from Gamzee's hands. Gamzee laughed at the boy. "Don't up and motherfucking worry, bro. I popped a pill before you got here." Tavros relaxed into the seat.

"Hey, uh, Gam? I was wondering if we could have a serious conversation? If, uh, that's okay." He blushed. _Smooth, Tavros. Rufioh would be proud. You dumbass._

"Sure, motherfucker. We can all up and rift somethin' serious." Gamzee smiled and started pushing up a hill, grunting with effort. "Motherfuck, why do I live up on this hill? Kills all the motherfucking miracles." Tavros stayed silent and took control of his chair. With some effort, both him and Gamzee got the chair up the hill.

"Thanks for pushing me, Gamzee." Tavros blushed and smiled. _I think I'm gonna tell him. I might actually do it.__  
_

"You're so motherfucking cute, Tavbro," Gamzee said bluntly. Tavros blushed. Sure, Gamzee had called him cute before, but never like that with the little tilt at the end of his sentence. Never looking him straight in the eyes. Tavros' face flared read, and he looked away from Gamzee's unwavering gaze, flustered. "I mean it, bro. You're cute as a kitten." Tavros look back to the violet eyes and the easy smile returned. Tavros sighed and started wheeling himself to Gamzee's front door. The tall stoner followed behind, chuckling to himself. He picked up the chair with Tavros in it and carried him inside. "Alright, motherfucker, you all good?"

Tavros nodded and smiled. "So, uh, what do you want to do?" Gamzee chuckled and mussed his mohawk, then he left to room. Tavros sat there, patient and used to his friend's antics, waiting. Gamzee came back, hiding his hands behind him.

"Pick a motherfucking hand." Tavros pointed towards his left hand and Gamzee pulled out Connect 4. "Hell yeah!"

Tavros laughed and watched Gamzee set up the game board, amused by his excitement. He rolled himself over to the table and said calmly, "I call red." Gamzee's appalled face mad him laugh. The tall stoner passed over the red chips and pouted. "Fire comes before smoke, right?" Tavros asked.

Gamzee nodded and then smiled. "Wanna up and make this more interesting, motherfucker?"

"Uh, what do you mean?" Tavros watched as Gamzee ran out of the room, eyes widen with worry. What could Gamzee be planning? The stoner came back, grinning like the cheshire cat. He held two bottles of hair dye in his hands, one pure, on light brown.

"If I lose, I'll dye my hair this here brown. If you lose, you up and dye it purple." He saw Tavros gulp, but the idea was already in his mind. Tavros sighed and nodded, knowing that both their heads would be dyed by the end of the night. Gamzee set the dyes down, sitting across from Tavros.

The cripple shakily put his first piece into a hole, the slot right in the middle. The game was on.

They both calmly took turns, poker faces on, though. Gamzee had an easy smile. Finally, it was the do-or-die move. They both had two pieces left, and Gamzee's hand moved towards the slot, dropping the chip in. "FUCK YES!" he yelled, jumping up excitedly.

Tavros facepalmed. He should've known that Gamzee would win. Even if the Juggalo was always high, he really paid attention to detail. The cripple covered his face with his hands. "Just do it."

Gamzee's strong arms started pushing him after dropping the two boxes in his lap. Tavros sighed and wondered if Vriska would attack him for having a purple mohawk. She probably would. Vriska wasn't very nice. Tavros blushed, remembering that drunken night he had with her. All they did was kiss, but it was enough to make her hate him. But she always harbored a small crush on the cripple. _I must be a really bad kisser._ Tavros giggled and paled as he felt the cool liquid being teased through his hair.

Gamzee felt Tavros tense and smiled. "No worries, Tavbro. You're gonna look motherfucking sweet." He poured more hair dye on his hand and massaged it through Tavros' mohawk, trying to calm the boy down. This was the best idea he had in a while.

Tavros sighed and relaxed into Gamzee's hand. He figured it was as good a time as any. "Hey, uh, Gamzee?"

"Yeah, Tavbro?" Gamzee smiled and kept dying Tavros' hair, slicking it back with dye. He'd do his next or have Tavros do it. "Hey bro, can you all up and work it into my hair?"

Tavros nodded and reached for Gamzee's hair brush. He gestured to the spot in front of him, waiting for Gamzee to sit. Once the tall male did, Tavros started the chore of brushing his tangled mess of hair. He ran his hand on Gamzee's head and pulled the brush through, getting stuck on tangles. He sighed and moved the brush to the end, taking his time to brush. "Uh, do you have a, uh, crush on anyone?"

Gamzee had been leaning against Tavros' knees, but he tried to move away as Tavros asked. The paraplegic's hands held him back though, making it impossible for Gamzee to see his face. "Uh, I guess so, motherfucker. What up and brought this on?"

Tavros bit his lip at Gamzee's answer, still brushing the taller man's hair. He was about halfway done, and Gamzee's seemingly untamable hair was falling flat. "Uh, no reason really. It's not important."

Gamzee reached a comforting hand up and patted Tavros' knee. "You can all up and motherfucking tell me."

Tavros blushed and sighed, his hand stilling. "Well, who do you have a crush on?" His voice was hopeful, but he knew that he wasn't Gamzee's first choice to have slept over, but he was glad he came to mind.

_Gamzee_ sucked in a breath. "How 'bout we motherfuckin' start dying my hair?" He heard Tavros' affirmative grunt. After a few minutes of silence, they boy felt a cool liquid drip onto his hair, followed by a pair of tentative hands, massaging his scalp. He sighed into the feeling and leaned back onto Tavros' legs. Tavros giggled and continued putting the dye in his hair, taking his time to enjoy the cuteness. "Why do you all up and motherfucking want to know?"

Tavros sighed, his confidence on the subject of plummeting. "I, uh, you don't have to tell me."

Gamzee chuckled and patted Tavros' leg again. "It's you, Tavbro."

**kisses and disses**

Dave held a sleeping John on his shoulder. They had been in the cemetery for two hours, and John had bawled himself to sleep on Dave. Said boy laid John down on his lap, stroking his hair. Dave stared at his sleeping face, memorizing the details. His eyes traced over his lips, up his jaw and around his ears, finally landing on John's blue eyes. They were wide open, staring at him curiously. John spoke in nothing above a whisper. "Dave, we skipped class."

Dave chuckled. Of course that's what Egbert would think about now. "I know, dude. C'mon. Let's go home." He started to stand up, but was stopped by John's hand on his face. "What's up?"

John smiled tiredly. "Carry me?" Dave stared down at him, looking through his shades. "C'mon Dave, Just carry me!" Dave sighed and picked John up, bridal style.

"Good thing you're so small. I can carry you easy enough." He felt a light tap on his head and assumed that John had hit him. He walked over to his bike, setting John on the motorcycle as he leaned down to get the helmet. John took the helmet from him and put it on, groaning. Dave got on the bike and handed him the blue back pack. John tiredly put it on, waiting for Dave to start the bike. As soon as the blonde did, John wrapped his arms tightly around Dave as he laid against him, clutching the back pack. Dave turned around in the cemetery, leaving and heading towards John's house. He sped up, trying to get there before John could fall asleep again. That wouldn't be a good situation._ Damn, I should've brought the car. _John nuzzled his head into Dave's shoulder, slowly waking up as the bike's speed increased.

Dave smirked as he flet John nuzzle him. That had been the reason for the motorcycle. He remembered the first time him and John and ridden it. The boy had been terrified, hiding his face in Dave's back. Dave laughed at the memory, he had such an adorkable derp as a friend. He turned a corner, leaning his body into it. John squealed, like he always did, but leaned along with him.

They finally pulled into John's driveway, parking near the white house. John jumped off the bike, grinning. He grabbed Dave's arm, pulling him towards the front door. He took his keys out of his pocket, slipping them into the lock and walking inside. Dave followed, shaking his head. _Such a dweeb._ The coolkid followed behind John, checking out his house. John hadn't cleaned his house in a week, and Dave sighed, knowing he'd have to help the brunette clean. They walked into John's kitchen, throwing their backpacks by the back door.

Dave made his way over to the fridge, opening it and pulling out and apple juice. He poked a hole in the juice box and stuck the straw in, taking a drag from it. He sighed as the liquid ran down his throat. He turned back around, facing the kitchen. John was staring at him, his eyebrow raised. "What the hell are you doing?"

Dave chuckled. "Dude, don't diss the aj."

John sighed and shook his head. "Dave, I only buy apple juice for you. " He heard Dave gasp dramatically and he shook his head again. "I just don't see the ap-" he was cut off by Dave crossing the kitchen and sticking the straw between between his lips.

"Suck." John blushed at the sexual tone in Dave's voice, but did as he was commanded. As soon as he stopped drinking, Dave pulled the juice box away, hiding a grin. John swallowed the liquid, still blushing. He looked at everything but Dave, eventually walking away from the situation. He started looking through his cabinets, searching for food. He pulled out a box of cake mix, staring at it before he got an idea.

Dave walked into John's living room, throwing himself on the couch. He stared at his juice box, picturing the way John's mouth looked around it. He stared at it for a good five minutes before he realized that John hadn't come into the living room. He got up off the couch, groaning as he moved his way into the kitchen. He walked in to John wearing an apron, standing over a bowl with cake mix, reading the box. "Whatcha doing, Egbert?"

John looked up in shock, almost dropping the box. He hadn't heard Dave come in. "Making a cake."

Dave stared at him behind his shades. He saw the sadness in John's eyes. "Do you want some help?" John nodded excitedly and Dave walked over to him. Together, they mixed the batter and put it in the oven. They set the timer and sat down in front of the stove, waiting for it to cook. "Remember helping your dad bake when we were kids?"

John stared at the oven, feeling the heat come off it. "Yeah." He leaned his head on Dave's shoulder as they watched the cake bake. Dave shifted slightly, reaching onto the counter, bring his hand down quickly so John couldn't see it. The brunette had closed his eyes, so he didn't see Dave's hand hover over his head, holding an cracked the egg over John's head, covering the boy in yoke and egg white. John's eyes snapped open and Dave jumped up, moving way from John with his hands raised. He was laughing so hard, his face was red. John glared at him, wiping the egg off his head, he grabbed the vegetable oik, pouring some in his hand.

"Dude. Don't. John, seriously."

"Sorry Dave. Payback's a bitch." He threw the handful of liquid at Dave, soaking him. Dave gasped and froze, staring at John, who was blushing from anger. They stared at each other for a moment before bursting into laughter. Dave clutched his stomach, his laughter ringing throughout the house. John gasped for breath, his laughter going silent from its intensity.

After a few minutes of laughing, they both calmed down, sitting on the floor with their back together. "Dude, you smell like egg."

"And who's fault is that?" John sighed, his head hitting the back of Dave's neck. Suddenly, the timer dinged and both boys jumped up. John ran to grab the oven mitts as Dave opened the oven, airing it out. They managed to get the cake out before it burned, high-fiving at their achievement. Dave slung an arm around John's shoulder, pulling the boy into the bathroom. he started the water in the bath, pushing John's body over into it. "What the hell?"

"Dude. Cleaning the egg out of your hair. You smell so bad." Dave chuckled as John handed him his thick black glasses. Dave grabbed the shampoo and put a tone on his hands, rubbing it through John's hair. The brunette sighed, relaxing at the touch. It reminded him of his dad bathing him when he was a kid. Dave rinsed the shampoo out and walked out of the bathroom to grab John a towel. He leaned against the wall, groaning as he thought of John, leaning into the bath, waiting for him. He ran his hands through his hair angrily. _Dude. Get it together. He's your bro. Your STRAIGHT AS HELL bro. Don't fuck this up, Strider. He's your best friend. Don't scare him away._ He shook his head and smoothed out his hair, retrieving a towel from the hall closet. As he walked into the bathroom, he threw the towel on John's head, leaning against the wall.

The brunette dried his head off, turning to grin at the stoic boy against the hall. Dave, however, didn't smile back, he was lost in thought. John pouted and stared at him, waiting for Dave to get out of his head. Dave was stuck in his thoughts about John.

The way the brunette laughed, smiled, walked and the clumsy way he ran in gym class. The thoughts ran through his head, one after the other. Dave realized that when someone asked him to describe John, he wouldn't say his best friend. _He's my other half._ He was shocked out of his thoughts and back into reality by that. His eyes met John's and he blushed. "Sorry."

John chuckled. "Dude, clean up. You smell like cooking oil." Dave flipped him off and huffed out of the room. He slipped his shirt off as he walked down the hallway.

"Oh, Egbert, I'm stealing a shirt." John protested but Dave shut his bedroom door, smirking. He walked over to John's dresser and opened the bottom drawer. He kept extra clothes in there for two reasons. In cases like this and they comforted John. It was a plus that the dork looked cute in them. He opened the door to leave the room, but fell back as John toppled onto him. He raised a eyebrow but wrapped his arms around the brunette. "Oh, darling, are you alright?"

"Dear, I was swooning at the sight of your face." John stared up at him through his thick, dark lashes. Dave couldn't hold himself back any longer, he leaned in and placed a kiss on the shorter boy's pink lips. He heard the other gasp and start to pull away, but hands were suddenly grabbing the back of his neck to him closer and deepen the kiss. His arms tightened around John and he leaned in more to make it easier on him. He got fed up with leaning and picked the brunette up, carrying him over to the bed. His shins. hit the mattress and he dropped John, pushing him down and laying over him. He licked John's lips, hoping for entrance, and the brunette eagerly permitted it.

Dave's tongue explored John's mouth, eagerly finding out every spot that would make him moan. He pulled away, gasping for breath and staring down into John's eyes. His shades must've been removed at some point during the kiss, bit he didn't mind. Red eyes met blue and they shared a smile. "You...you kissed me," John stuttered.

Dave grinned, resting his head on his hand. "You kissed back."

John blushed. "Well...fuck you."

"You seem to want to." Dave winked a red eye, enjoying John's nervous giggle. "Dude, really?"

"What?"

"You don't get it?"

"Get what?"

"You fucking derp. I have a crush on you." Dave sat up and turned away from John, staring at the wall.

John squeaked. "You do?"

_Fuck. Good job. Scare him away, you couldn't keep your hands to yourself, could you? _"Yeah...I do."

He expected John to get mad. He expected him to storm out of the room and kick him out. What he didn't expect was the derp's arms around his waist and a peck on the cheek. "I like you, too."

**kisses and disses**

Sollux blinked behind his glasses, shocked that he had done that. Karkat wasn't looking at him, but they had both sat down at the table in the library. The asian was trying to figure out what to say to the boy he had kissed, but didn't know what could possibly make things right. "KK...that wath a big mithtake."

"Why?" Karkat's eyes glanced at him, but wandered back down to the sketchpad in his lap. His pencil was moving rapidly across the page and he was biting his lip.

"You jutht got over a break up and I totally took advantage of that. I'm thorry. I should have athked if you were alright with it before I did anything. And now I ruined our planth and I'm really thorry." Karkat stared at him with wide eyes.

"Our plans are ruined?" He bit his lip. "I thought...you were disgusted with what you did and that's why were hanging around!" He blushed, clearly guessing wrong. "If it helps, I didn't mind."

Sollux stared at Karkat, clearly confused. "You...didn't?"

"No, you dumbass! I fucking didn't!" He glared at Sollux. "If I did, I would'e fucking hit you by now! Ugh!"

"I have a fucking cruth on you, and you don't mind?"

"No! I fucking like you, too! Jesus, Sollux!" Karkat stared down at his sketchpad, flushing a bright red. Sollux gaped at him. "What? It's not like we're going to date. I mean...Terezi and I broke up today! We have to wait at least a week."

Sollux paled and stood up. "Let'th get going." He started walking out of the library. Karkat scrambled to catch up. They made their way silently to Sollux's mustard-yellow car. The seats were red and blue leather, a gift for his sixteenth birthday. He sat in the driver's seat, buckling up automatically. His hands tightened around the steering wheel as Karkat got in, showing his discomfort.

They silently drove to Karkat's house, the red-eyed boy shrinking in his seat as they reached it. "Well...thanks for the ride." He slowly unbuckled and opened the door. They heard yelling coming from inside the house and Sollux sighed.

"Athhole, get back in. You can thtay at my plathe tonight." Karkat closed the car door and Sollux took off in the direction of his house. _Pull yourthelf together, Thollux. Jutht talk to him. _"Tho...KK, um, about the kith..."

"Don't worry. I don't blame you. I don't understand WHY, but I don't blame you."

Sollux stared straight ahead, pulling out to the roadside so he could face Karkat. "Jethuth! You're tho denth. I LIKE you." He didn't look at Karkat's face. Couldn't force himself to. He heard a gasp and glanced over, seeing the boy blush. "I kithed you becauthe I didn't to thee you hurt. I jutht couldn't th-" he was cut off by feverish lips pressing themselves against his own. Karkat kissed him with a wet face and heated passion. They boy had been crying before he kissed the asian. Sollux blushed as he pulled away, staring wide-eyed behind his glasses.

"Let's go to your place and talk more, okay?" Karkat turned and stared out the window, a bit tense.

Sollux pulled back onto the road, shaking a little. They made it home in one piece and Sollux grabbed Karkat's hand, pulling him up into the house and into his bedroom. As soon as they made it into the extension-cord-disaster, explosion waiting to happen room, the shorter boy's hands were tangled in the asian's long hair and was placing heated kisses on the other. Sollux grabbed his hips, lifting him up and leaning against the door for balance. They both moaned into the kiss, pulling away a few minutes into it. Karkat attacked Sollux's neck, kissing it gently. The brunette sucked gently on the asian's neck, giggling slightly. Sollux gasped and tightened his grip on Karkat, hoping he wouldn't drop the boy.

Suddenly, Karkat froze. He pulled away from Sollux's neck, staring with wide eyes. Sollux smiled and pecked his lips, blushing slightly. "KK...I like you a lot."

"I...like you too," the brunette admitted.

Sollux chewed his lip. "Tho...are we...boyfriendth or thomething?"

Karkat nodded. "I'd really like that." Sollux blushed happily. "But we can't."

"What? Why not?" His eyes showed hurt.

"I just got out of a relationship today! You can't expect me to be over that already!"

Sollux gaped and placed Karkat on the floor. "KK...are you thure?" _Pleathe thay you're kidding. Pleathe. Pleathe. PLEATHE!"_

Karkat sighed. "Yeah. I like you Sollux, but..." Sollux turned and placed his hand on the door knob. "I do!" He opened the door. "Just, I c- hey, where are you going?"

Sollux turned and forced a smile. "Don't worry KK, I'll be right back." He walked out of the room quickly, leaving a confused Karkat behind. Sollux ran down the hallway to the bathroom, slamming the door and locking it. He opened his medicine cabinet and bit his lip, reaching up for a pill bottle. He turned the cap and tipped it upside down over the counter. Out clattered a razor blade. _KK ithn't the only one with a problem._

Sollux was the type that cute at least once a day. He saw no joy in anything except computers. Karkat was the first thing that really made him happy after Aradia died from overdosing herself with anti-depressants.

He picked up the razor and set it on his wrist. He hissed as it pressed into his skin, drawing blood. The red liquid dripped down his arm, drawing a pattern over the skin. _Like a painting. _He slid the razor across and off his wrist and heard the TV click on in his room. He placed the razor higher up on his arm, making another cut. Then, he slapped the razor on the counter, tears leaking out of his eyes. _Unlovable._

A few minutes later, he had calmed down a little bit. His head cleared enough to let him know that he had to clean up the blood-covered counter. He wiped it down, then soaked his arm under the running water. He wrapped his arm in a bandage and sighed, starting at himself in the mirror. His face was puffy and red, but a few splashes of water fixed that. He forced a smile and walked back to his room. Karkat's head snapped to the door and a relieved sigh left his lips. "Oh, thank God!"

"Heh. Worried, KK?" Sollux walked over to his bed and sat next to the shorter boy, keeping a foot of distance between them. Karkat looked at him from the corner of his eye but didn't say anything. Sollux stared at the screen, hoping Karkat wouldn't notice his discomfort.

The next was full of awkward silence that was filled by the sounds on the television. Finally, Karkat broke the silence. "Sollux...are you okay?"

"Of couthe, why wouldn't I be okay? Jutht becauthe my heart got broken doethn't mean I have to cry." He faced away from Karkat, his legs on the floor as he leaned on his hands.

He hoped Karkat would comfort him. Hoped the short boy would wrap his tiny arms around him and tell him that he's loved. He hoped there would be some sort of comfort.

Sollux felt the bed shirt and his heart leaped our of his chest. He heard quiet footsteps and held his breath. But the door opened and closed. There was only silence.

**kisses and disses**


End file.
